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A Choristers' Guide To Keeping Conductors In Line
- |The basic training of every singer should, of course, include myriad types of practical and theoret...

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6674 0

Accordion jokes
- |An accordion is a bagpipe with pleats.Q: What is the definition of an optimist?A: An accordion play...

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2692 5.25

Any last requests?
- |A cowboy and a biker are on death row, and are to be executed on the same day. The day comes, and t...

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2401 0

Arriving at Heaven
- |A soprano died and went to Heaven. St. Peter stopped her at the gate asking, "Well, how many false ...

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2896 0

Arriving in Heaven
- |Arriving in HeavenThree men die and go to heaven and queue to meet St. Peter.St. Peter: Hi, what's ...

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4930 0

Bach in a Minuet
- |A note left for a pianist from his wifeGone Chopin, (have Liszt), Bach in a Minuet...

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797 0

Bagpipe jokes
- |Q: Why do bagpipers walk when they play?A: To get away from the noise.Q: What's the only thing wors...

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174 0

Banjo jokes
- |Q: How many banjo players does it take to change a light bulb?A: Only one, but all the others gathe...

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186 0

Bass jokes
- |Q: Why did the bass player get mad at the timpanist?A: He turned a peg and wouldn't tell the bass p...

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168 0

Bassoon jokes
- |Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?A: To get away from the bassoon recital.Q: Why is a bassoon b...

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161 0

Cello jokes
- |Q: What is the difference between a cello and a coffin?A: The coffin has the corpse on the inside.Q...

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235 0

Clarinet jokes
- |Q: What's the definition of a nerd?A: Someone who has his or her own alto clarinet.Q: Why do clarin...

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184 0

Contacting a friend
- |Two violinists make a pact that whoever dies first, he will contact the other and tell him what lif...

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483 0

Drum joke Q & A
- |Q: Why do drummers have a half ounce more brains than horses?A: So they don't disgrace themselves a...

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167 0

- |From: Efficiency & Ticket, Ltd., Management ConsultantsTo: Chairman, The London Symphony OrchestraR...

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480 0

English horn jokes
- |Q: What is the difference between hearing an English horn solo and being tortured?A: One is far mor...

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472 0

Fight between the musicians
- |At a concert hall one night, the stage manager comes across an oboe player and a viola player havin...

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767 0

Flute jokes
- |Q: What's the definition of a minor second?A: Two flutes playing a unison.Flute players spend half ...

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470 0

French horn jokes
- |Q: What do you get when you cross a French horn player with a goal post?A: A goal post that can't m...

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535 0

George Bernard Shaw
- |While at a concert being performed by a very bad orchestra, George Bernard Shaw was asked what he'd...

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390 0

Glossary of music terms
- |Accent: An unusual manner of pronunciation, e.g. "Y'all sang that real good!"Accidentals: Wrong not...

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592 0

Guitar jokes
- |Q: How do you make him stop playing?A: Put notes on it!Q: What did the guitar say to the guitarist?...

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703 0

Harmonica jokes
- |Steve Wright: I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, a...

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785 0

Harp jokes
- |A harp is a nude piano.A Celtic harpist spends half her time tuning her harp, and the other half pl...

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2767 0

Harpsichord jokes
- |The late Sir Thomas Beecham used to say the sound of the harpsichord is like "two skeletons making ...

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925 0

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